Unless we become like children

“And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them and said,
‘Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.’”
(Matthew 18:2–3, ESV)

Many of us have probably noticed that a bond formed with another person in childhood or adolescence is far stronger than one formed in adulthood. I have often been amazed at how, when you meet a former classmate whom you have not seen for twenty or even thirty years, you can immediately communicate with ease—as if you had parted only recently. Even if that friendship in childhood lasted only a few years.

By contrast, you may interact closely with someone (for example, at work or even in church!) for ten years or more, yet still feel that the same kind of free, open connection is missing—that you never truly come to know that person fully.

Why is this so?
Because children have not yet learned to separate what is “acceptable” to say from what is not. They do not yet have personal ambitions or long-term goals. They do not think far ahead; they live for today. Tomorrow is their parents’ concern.

That is why Scripture says:

“Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.”
(Matthew 6:31, 33, ESV)

When a person grows up, this open, sincere, carefree season comes to an end. Competition appears, along with the awareness that one must achieve something in life, establish oneself—often by surpassing others, attaining more than they do. Guided by these new goals, a person begins to limit information, to say not what he truly thinks, but what serves his ambitions. Hypocrisy and insincerity arise, while at the same time trying not to cross certain established norms of “proper” behavior (the Pharisees).

A person puts on a kind of shell, beneath which one can never fully see his heart. This is something absent in childhood—children are open and sincere; they say what they think. That is why a relationship or friendship formed in adulthood can never equal one formed in childhood.

Of course, here I am speaking about unbelievers. Among believers it should not be so. It should be the opposite: in our relationships with one another—and first of all with God—we must become like children, without hidden motives, without fear of being misunderstood, or of damaging our reputation, or worse, our “career” in the church. Such believers will not enter the kingdom of heaven.

This does not mean that we should open ourselves to the world—that can even be dangerous:

“Do not give dogs what is holy, and do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you.”
(Matthew 7:6, ESV)

The worst part is that this lack of openness—this filtering of information and speaking only what seems appropriate—we begin to apply in our relationship with God. We are afraid to confess to Him in prayer that we love the world (or certain things in the world) more than Him. In pursuing our own goals and recognition among people, we present these things to God as service to Him.

I will not go into details here. Anyone who examines himself honestly can see these things everywhere—in the church, and of course, within himself.

“Cleanse out the old leaven that you may be a new lump.”
(1 Corinthians 5:7, ESV)

Therefore, let us become like children, so that we may enter the kingdom of God.